When you’re embroiled in a battle (big or small) with your Ex, how much of it is an attempt at retribution for the pain you’re feeling?
If you’re the one that has been left, cheated on or hurt intentionally, then I can see the easy trap of wanting to just hurt them back. Unfortunately, what I (and many I have seen) do is I leave my hurt unnamed and go after some other battle in the hopes of healing that wound. What happens instead is new wounds are opened or 100 more are revisited and the initial pain I was seeking help for (albeit in a non-productive way) gets left open.
How can you stop that cycle?
Well, one of the first things I have learned is do not deny that pain you are feeling! Now that’s not something you give to your kids or your Ex. Give it to a trusted friend. Name it. Say it out loud!
I AM FEELING……. (hurt), (mad), (abandon), (disrespected). Need help? I found a good list HERE.
Let’s start today!
Tell me, How are you feeling?